Met

After spending the first two weeks of July in a state of extreme exhaustion, I did nothing but felt tired. When it was hot in Changchun, it was cool enough to wear, but still felt breathless, like a stone hanging in the heart, unable to land for a long time. There were no more acquaintances in the school. They left the list and faced another kind of life alone, another group of people. Every day, the 2.1 line between the dormitory and the laboratory is mechanical and numb, just like a clock, repeating the fixed steps. Smiling or talking with a mask, soberly pretending to be confused, sometimes you will feel a hard day. The time in the laboratory is always long and impatient. Most of the time, I choose silence. Everything seems calm, and the waves in my heart are only clear by myself. I am not a person who is good at pouring out the unhappiness in life to others, and some people have no choice but to talk to those who are close to me. The most difficult mood to talk to is often the most afraid of being known by the loved one. Maybe it was to choose a bed. Seven hours of sleep couldn’t be worse any more. One illusion after another appeared in dreams one after another. There were no stories, messy and no clues, just like a mess of scattered sand, scattered in the past time. I am only 23 years old, but I have such a terrible sleep. Remove a person from the friends list. The boy who can’t stand being stingy is that I don’t care about you, and I don’t owe you. Some people always think that they are older than others, but in fact, they are just as light as cigarettes. I am just a layman, neither exquisite nor pure, neither tolerant nor generous. I really didn’t have much leisure to forgive others before I took care of myself and my family. No longer like crying as before, but one day, when hearing a song of Liu Ruoying, tears suddenly broke away. The novel was written only to end, but it was delayed again and again. It was not really busy, but just tired. I become more and more impatient when dealing with many things. After reading a book, I suddenly had the desire to write another story. When I watched “The loser man” at breakfast, I suddenly felt that Liu Yan was indeed a goddess even if he didn’t make a fool of himself. No wonder that the hormones of those men were too strong. I watched a episode of Happy men just to see Nicholas Tse. My idol in middle school, when I was young and became Uncle, I was still very handsome. I don’t deny that I am anthomaniac. Beautiful things are like poison, and poisonous things are always full of temptation, which makes people infatuated. So think before. When I was in middle school, my life was boring. I thought it would be good if I could stay up to college except studying. When I was in college, I spent my parents’ hard-earned money openly, hoping that I could work early and support myself by myself. Last winter, I was preparing for the Postgraduate Entrance Examination. I was busy every day, thinking that everything would be fine if I entered the postgraduate entrance examination. However, time goes and goes, scenery changes and changes, many people become passers-by, and many memories become past. So many people say that tomorrow will be better, but tomorrow is never perfect. Thinking of the future, I always feel panic. Without immortality, my youth is getting farther and farther. I am still young, but I will grow old eventually. I always felt that I was not good enough and wanted to die and start all over again. But when I woke up late at night, I heard the gurgling rain outside the window. The noise seemed to be far away from the sound and the air was light, I suddenly feel that many things have become unreasonable. People who don’t want to ignore it can ignore it. Keep doing what you like. If you think it over, you can see it lightly, so many troubles will follow the cloud and the wind. Life has not become better, but it has taught me how to become a better self. I know the ideal is very full, the reality is very skinny, and I am still working hard and laughing attentively. Let the world be troubled, let the world be noisy, still stay in the warm background of time, waiting for the best self. Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) the snow in spring

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