On

At this time, I didn’t know why, my heart was so painful that I couldn’t breathe, and my tears turned around in my eyes unwillingly! The emptiness that never existed in my heart was a pain that could not be expressed in words. Maybe it is because I am too melodramatic, or it is because I have a sentimental heart! I once thought that time would be a good medicine to smooth the wounds left by those years! It can dilute memory; You can forget many people or things, and you can forget all happy or unhappy things in the long gone time. But in the end, what I want to forget is still so clear! Closing my eyes, it was so close but so real. It seemed that I could still hear the wind of yesterday and smell the fragrance emitted when the flowers were in full bloom. When I opened my eyes, I found that everything had already been so far away. Maybe it was no longer my memory at all, and everything was blurred. I don’t want to recall the past, just to forget it! But I always remember it inadvertently. Four years, it should be said to be a very long time, it red cherry, green plantain. For a long time, I have been deceiving myself and others, hoping that one day I will go back to the past! Perhaps those injuries that cannot be told are the most painful! Because we can only put it quietly in the bottom of our heart, so that we can not mention the past! Later, I gradually got used to silence, used to disguise my inner pain in front of the crowd, and didn’t let my heart stir any more! Hide everything with indifference, or upset, or joy! Just because I am afraid of hurt, I am afraid that yesterday will reappear! If you understand me, why do I worry? If you don’t understand me, what should I ask?, in fact, I don’t have such arrogance and confidence. Instead, I have such unspeakable self-abasement in my heart! What I have always wanted is just a simple and simple friendship, an ordinary life journey. I don’t expect any great achievements, but I just expect to join hands with ER in this ordinary life, choose a city die! Walk around the world in mutual help. Maybe this world is just like what I said when chatting with a friend: not all things will come to an end as long as you stick to them! Because what you care about may be just a careless move in others’ eyes! Maybe others just say it casually, don’t worry too much about what others say! Maybe she is right because she is too stupid! But I really want to say to her, if I don’t care about people, how can I remember the casual words in my heart? Most of the time, maybe you shouldn’t be too serious. If you are serious, you have already lost everything and finally lost your heart. Sometimes, I would shake my head and smile bitterly, laughing at my innocence and stupidity, and more often I would laugh at my helplessness for all this! Maybe this is the so-called destiny that everyone should have! I can only say that my destiny is too bad! All the remaining courage about love has been gradually exhausted. Facing everything, we can only avoid to reduce the pain in our heart, making everything seem not to care so much! In fact, who will really understand? Want to love, but dare not love, want to stay, but dare not stay! This is the truest helplessness in my heart. In fact, there has been a biggest question lingering in my heart for a long time, but I haven’t figured it out! Praying for Buddha, Buddha is very helpless! I once asked Buddha devoutly: to send a gift to the person I love, I just have a simple idea to surprise her. I can see happiness, is this also wrong? However, no matter how I ask, Buddha has been silent. It seems that I am really wrong. Is my idea too simple or the world too complicated? Some things, wrong, is a lifetime, irreversible! In fact, when chatting with a friend, I think what she said is right; I don’t know what you used to be like, maybe your deep understanding makes you become like this, but you have to remember that if a girl likes you, she won’t let you buy it for her. She doesn’t want anything. As long as you are around, you will be very happy and satisfied. However, I want to say: is it wrong that I just want to surprise a person who likes it, and that’s all? Maybe I really failed because I didn’t understand each other’s thoughts all the time. Maybe everything is wrong. I am a person who doesn’t know how to love! I think love is serious; It is to do everything to make the other party happy and fast! It turns out that I have always been wrong! Alas! Finally, I found that this idea is too simple! Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Like (prose editor: indifferent) change the way to continue to stay with this city I went out at 6 o’clock in the morning and came back at almost 8 o’clock in the evening. From beginning to end, I only welcomed myself with silence; Since I went to college, on weekends… [Original essay] string words Since winter, the sky is dry and the snow is misty. The whole earth is desolate and empty. Whether your mood is like a year, or… Forever military dream Forever military Dream (Ma Xiaochun, Kangle county, Gansu province) memories are like meteors, passing through the unmarked and blurred eyes, and the outline gradually… Spring rain I like spring rain like everything on the Earth. Just after the new year, the sky began to rain. I really like the spring in Jiangnan… Plucked the snowflakes of Dreams (modified) Near the new year, the first snow fell. I was surprised to read a long scroll in the morning, the white one is snow, and the gray one is tree… Self The fashion is transient, and the style is permanent. Things that can shine on others may not be put here. In…

Trust

In December, my family welcomed the decoration of the new house. In the process of decoration, I was faced with the Centralized Purchase of all kinds of decorative materials. In this process, I had to contact with all kinds of dealers. I found that I didn’t even know myself. I usually ask several stores of the same type of materials before deciding which store to buy. In fact, compared with the prices of different stores, there is generally little difference, but I dare not make a decision easily. After all, I don’t trust the store owner. I have to compare several more stores with each material I buy, just for peace of mind, which is a bit embarrassing, I always feel it is a big sin to be fooled by the seller. One of the shopkeeper told me this sentence: I gave you all my courage, and you still felt bitter, which made me see my ugly soul unconsciously. In fact, businessmen also want to live. It is natural for them to make money, just like we get wages at work, but we always feel that they cheat us. The more they explained, the stronger our suspicion was. During this period, I deeply felt that the most basic sense of trust between people was gone, and only the naked money transaction relationship existed. Perhaps for thousands of years, we have gradually lost the most basic relationship trust between people in the environment of no traitors and no business. In fact, the trust we lost is definitely not limited to those with businessmen, but also includes colleagues, leaders, even our parents and spouses. I feel very scared when thinking of it, because we are actually playing such a role. I remembered how my parents taught me not to be close to strangers. Now I also teach my children with the same idea. We feel that the people around us are all cheaters. They are all people who want to take advantage of us. In the workplace, I always stick to the idea of doing things steadfastly, and there is no suspicion with my colleagues. It can be said that I am a simple-minded person. Nowadays, disharmonious voices among some colleagues can always be heard. This reminds me of an unpleasant thing that happened to me in last July. Since I had a conflict with the department leaders. I used to attribute things to my lack of endurance and impatience. In fact, the most fundamental reason is the distrust of each other, because of the distrust of leaders, I tried my best to explain that under the circumstance that the leader couldn’t accept it, I was totally disappointed and my mood was out of control. If we believed each other’s words at that time, we wouldn’t have been entangled all the time and ended up with farce, which also brought a very negative impact on the department. Both buyers and sellers lack trust. The simple business relationship is mixed with too many other things, which leads to double the transaction time and cost, making each other exhausted; Colleagues lack trust, the work cannot be well handed over and cooperated; The lack of trust between leaders and subordinates causes disunity to the department, and the assigned work tasks cannot be well implemented; The lack of trust between children and parents, the family affection of flesh and blood gradually evolved into an excuse for complaining; The lack of trust between couples, the marriage is facing breakdown, and the family is facing dissolution, which affects the stability of the society. In 2013, China Youth Daily published the social mentality blue book “China Social Mentality Research Report 2012-2013” published by the Chinese Academy of Social Sciences. The report said that China’s trust fell below the bottom line of 60 points, and seven adults did not believe in strangers. Spring elimination snow Spring elimination snow, multi-the yao nian, unspoken. Reading from afar, it is just above that snowfield. The snow is really beautiful, after all it is spring… Waiting Waiting is a kind of persistence, sticking to a certain belief and never giving up. Maybe because of a certain commitment, or because of a certain… Be good at listening to different voices and opinions On October 6th, I published a travel essay: “beautiful autumn scenery”, which was obtained by many literary websites… Read The Bridges of Madison County “When the white moth spreads its wings, you can come to me at any time”. I think, if I am a man, be accepted… From today on, I want to be happy I read “the biography of Hulan River” long time ago, and I remember that I was really in a heavy mood for a long time. Which characters caused me… Sick time I sneezed one after another these days. I said someone was reading me and others said I was sick. Finally, the doctor also said I was…